Hi. Would it be possible to do this unpaid as I'm only interested in the experience I'll gain and the vast opportunities that will be open to me and just how good it'll look on my C.V.

Im an artist, I can perform open heart surgery with a tin opener and coat hanger frame.. please consider it, or I have to go back to the Circus.. where my skills are of no use to anyone except to entertain u gawping idiots... and I dont even get dental cover!

Heard joke once: Man goes to
doctor. Says he's depressed. Says
life seems harsh and cruel. Says he
feels all alone in a threatening world
where what lies ahead is vague and
uncertain. Doctor says "Treatment is
simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in
town tonight. Go and see him. That
should pick you up." Man bursts into
tears. Says "But, doctor...I am
Pagliacci."

Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on
snare drum. Curtains. Fade to black.

Lights up:

Kismet (or any other person!!!)stands naked in front of his mirror. To his surprise, he gets a hard on. He movs away from the mirror and he becomes floppy. He stands in front of the mirror, he get hard.
Kismet shouts down to his wife, "hey babe, guess what, everytime I stand naked in front of the mirror, I get a hard oon!" His wife shouts back, "even your cock thinks you're a c*nt."

Blackout.

I thank ye..

Kismet or any other person?

If you know me at all, you'll know that if I
look in the mirror and see I have
company of any kind, I'll be so hard with
gratitude the mirror will crack to shards
in an instant

Kismet, you didn't 'hear' that joke. You stole it verbatim from Alan Moore.

The whole thing's a quote from 'Heard a
joke' onwards is from Watchmen. Glad
you got it.